Your psychologist really isn’t judging you. Here’s how I know.

There are so many people who are reluctant to see a psychologist. A common thing I hear is, “I’m embarrassed and I fear the psychologist might judge me.”

Here’s how I know that your psychologist is not judging you. When I talk to people in my personal life about what I do for a living, they often exhibit pity for me. “How do you do it?” they ask. “How do you listen to people’s problems all day long without losing your mind?” Well, I’m here to clear up the fact that, for a psychologist, it’s not like that at all. We have a passion for the systematic and scientific study of behavior and mental processes. When we listen to people’s “problems” we are not thinking and speaking like we would in a personal conversation. We are actually trying to put puzzle pieces together to gain an ultimate understanding of our client and their primary concerns. We are also (sometimes simultaneously) thinking about the most useful interventions to apply. Basically, we are not sitting there in complete pity for the person sitting in front of us. It’s actually the opposite. We believe that all human behavior comes from a psychologically legitimate place! Whether you’ve committed murder or stolen your brother’s bike, we are interested in the psychologically legitimate reason as to why it happened and/or how to help you. Listen, I must emphasize that we do not condone antisocial behavior (like, *high five* you cut someone in the subway). However it is not our job to judge your behavior like a parent, teacher, police officer or court judge. We will not treat you like an authority figure would. It is our job to listen and help from the standpoint of someone who knows that your behavior is not shameful but is instead psychologically understandable. So don’t worry. We are safe.